The Divorce, a child's perspective...

"We're getting a divorce." I heard my father say.
Suddenly, his voice seemed very far away.
"You will be getting a new house and new school.
But you will have to learn how to live by new rules."
I looked up at him and said with fear in my heart,
"Do you have a new job, and when do you start?"
"I will not be going!" He said rather cheerily.
He seemed almost happy at the prospect of leaving me.
I said "Please let me stay!! I promise I'll be good!!!"
He sternly said "NO" and that was all there was to it.
I looked at his face. There were no tears in his eyes.
I didn't want him to see the ones welling in mine.
So I made the journey to a place I'd never known.
One thing was for certain. This house was not home.
My mother was so sad. She cried all the time.
She found it hard to deal with her worst fears realized.
"We're getting a divorce." I considered what that means.
could it possibly include not just my mother....but me?
My siblings had already gone off to college,
pursuing their dreams and furthering their knowledge.
My father had stayed until they were ready to leave,
but for some reason he seemed to just give up on me.
He never came to see me. He hardly ever called,
so I chose to believe he didn't love me at all.
Many are the times I've heard the man say he's sorry,
but forgiveness, to me, seems like a mission impossible.
I can't help but compare my father's life to my mother's.
I don't think it is fair that she had to suffer.
I resent the tenderness that I see him show
to a woman who has no children of her own.
I love the woman. I honestly do.
But I resent her presence in my heart through and through.
When I look at my children, I am filled with confusion.
How could any parent ever want to leave them?
One thing I am sure of is that they will always know
that I truly love them, and I will never go.